apac-header-small.png
 

Member’s Login

Join APAC

Join APAC

Member's News

Resources

  resources


Latest Article


Reflections Of An Executive Coach: A Perspective From Singapore

REFLECTIONS ON LEARNING, EARNING AND YEARNING. 

“Those who know the rules of true wisdom are lower than those who love them. Those who love them are lower than those who follow them". ----- Chinese Proverb----- 

QUO VADIS There is a saying that if you don’t know where you are going, any road will take you there. We are so engrossed in our daily activities that often we do not stop to ask where we are going or do not care where we go, as long as we are busy and expend vast energy in the process. So we end up quite often traveling on the wrong road and we numbingly know that no amount of travel on the wrong road will take us to the desired destination. Apart from knowing which road to take, it is also important to have a feel for the environment in which our journey takes place. As we survey the surroundings, it is not a scenic picture. The world seems entangled in a mess. A huge mess (an understatement). Who can untangle the tangle? Coaches can, in a small and humble way. The process is likened to the coach lighting one candle; the coachee in turn lights another person's candle, and the process continues. Little things have a way of adding up and then the sum becomes significantly meaningful. If this process brings about more understanding and trust between people of the world and ends up with more peace and less violence on earth, we in the coaching profession would have done our wee bit.  

 
A Business Coaching Case Study: Coaching Hugh

Hugh came to coaching when his personal chaos was interfering with his business aspirations. He was exhausted from working long hours, had low energy and was running in circles. However, he knew from his previous mentor that there was a bigger picture and wanted to gain clarity on that so he could move in a direction to realise this picture. His day-to-day life was so chaotic that he had lost sight of this bigger picture was unable to refocus for any sustained period of time. He was relieved to be able to share his situation with someone who actively listened. A dedicated listener was something that Hugh identified had been lacking in his life. 

His coach immediately held the vision that he described - turning 40 and traveling to European suppliers, lecturing in design and being recognised as an expert on industrial glass design. Creating, networking and selling is where Hugh sees himself within seven years. The coaching interaction focused on Hugh moving from a chaotic entrepreneur/technician, to a professional businessman.  

Hugh presented with a strong business, loads of passion, drive and commitment and a willingness to change. This was the key in the coaching relationship - Hugh’s willingness to move from chaos to serenity, and his belief that this was possible. 

Using the business equity model tool of reviewing where and how his time was spent over the past 3 months, he quickly identified that a bookkeeper was required as he was spending far too much time on this administrative task. This one action alone has freed up energy, time and clarity. Coaching sessions continued to work on delegation versus abdication, using the bookkeeper as the benchmark. 

She has turned out to be a pivotal staff member in his company and Hugh attributes this to the time and effort he took in hiring her, training her and then supervising her to a point where she now works autonomously. Coaching continues to remind Hugh that this is possible with all his staff, as long as he puts in the time up front. 

Time was spent looking at lifestyle, the second part of the WorkStyle equation (work + lifestyle = WorkStyle ®). One of Hugh’s most pressing goals was to quit smoking and within three weeks of working with his coach he was committed to doing this and did. Hugh was asked what would his life look like without smoking and he was thrilled with this picture. Another area of health that showed up was that he wanted to play golf at least twice per month - by my mentioning this at every coaching session this goal was top of mind, not as a fantasy but as a reality. 

When Hugh was introduced to the Clean Sweep program, it was apparent that both his personal and business finances were in serious debt. The coaching relationship was able to offer Hugh a safe and non-judgemental place for him to be honest about where he was really at financially. The confidence that he found as a result of this ‘safe place’ moved him to talk with investors, a financial planner and review his relationship with his accountant. After thinking he needed a cash injection, Hugh turned down an offer from venture capitalists and is delighted to report the company is now in a position of self funding with no debt. In Hugh’s own words “How cool is that!” As Hugh says, “Since commencing with merry mentality, I have noticed that both my personal and business lifestyles have developed and improved in various ways. My financial position has alsoprospered enormously due to (the) coaching.”

His coach’s role is to continually hold the big picture when he cannot see the woods for the trees. By re-introducing Covey’s 7 Habits, and Gerber’s E-Myth these confirmed that what he thought was possible for his business was possible, versus being a pipe dream. He also found the Stages of Business Growth model invaluable for identification and confirmation of where he and his business lay in the bigger picture. This tool alone has dramatically increased his energy and motivation. 

Part of Hugh’s coaching included his setting up his home office professionally versus just on the dining table - this again freed up energy and set him up to work when he was not at his studio. 

Having more fun was a key part of moving forward, again as a motivator and stress reliever. By focusing on himself and his actions, Hugh’s staff of nine commented to him that he was ‘taking charge’ and his partner also commented on his progress. This outside feedback concreted the awareness that he was getting about himself. Again, in Hugh’s own words “All those around me over the last 12 months have noticed a dramatic change in my ability to be a better manager, employer, communicator, friend and person.” 

Hugh is now able to wear the title of MD versus ‘one of the boys’ and is gaining more respect from his staff, peers, suppliers and family. In his field of designer glass, ego can be a drawback and something that is competition amongst the industry. A number of sessions were spent discussing this in depth and discovering who Hugh felt comfortable being. How much of himself did he want to identify with his business, and was it possible to turn this into a turnkey operation? Actions such as networking with peers, and possible clients have become far more enjoyable for Hugh now that he has a clearer idea of who he is in his business and industry. 

Hugh has confirmed that a healthy WorkStyle is crucial to be truly successful both personally and professionally. Passion and drive certainly play a part but until we manage our own health and well being, passion and drive can be unfocussed and energy draining. 

(Belinda Merry who wrote this Case study can be reached at belinda@belindam.com, her web site is www.belindam.com)

 
A Personal/Life Coaching Case Study: Coaching Maree

Maree enquired about life coaching after reading an article by Belinda Merry in an industry magazine. Initially, Maree found it difficult to spend the coaching session time talking about herself and often tried to turn the conversation on to her coach. It was gently explained that coaching is about the client and, in this specific working relationship, discovering and designing a healthy WorkStyle. After a couple of sessions Maree came to understand this and loved being able to talk about herself, guilt free, to someone who listened generously as previously she was used to being there for others.As an executive assistant, Maree is extremely organised and manages her time well.  

Why she engaged a coach was to assist her through a time of turmoil that she knew was coming up – moving house, house sitting in a number of different venues, and finally purchasing her own home. To support Maree in her vision of smooth moves, she was held accountable for her health routine, no matter where she was living. This stretched her as she indicated that she would have usually stopped exercising until her living arrangements were more stable. This one accountability flowed through into her diet, her sleep and thus her energy. As Maree took more responsibility for her energy she found that the smooth moves were in fact a reality, not just a dream as she had first thought. 

Another area focused on was Maree’s involvement in her professional association. She was keen to apply for a residential scholarship but did not feel that she had the qualifications to be selected. Each week she was encouraged to take another action towards completing and submitting her application and eventually this was completed. Unfortunately, she missed the cut off date (a printing error, no fault of her own) and she was disappointed that this had occurred considering the amount of work she had put into the application. 

This situation became an opportunity for Maree to practice her negotiation and assertiveness skills and the coaching conversations were guided so that she could herself see this possibility. She commenced negotiations with the industry body to seek an apology and, eventually, received a written apology from the president and could now lay the matter to rest. Concurrent with her scholarship application, Maree was nominated and subsequently voted as her region’s Branch Manager and she was delighted with this outcome. Coaching conversations around boundaries and‘principles before personalities’ gave her some extra tools to use during her this time. Maree subsequently wrote a follow-up article in the same industry magazine that Belinda’s article initially appeared in. Here is an extract: 

“I was very nervous at the thought initially, but Belinda immediately put me at ease. We had instant rapport. Our initial session was to set goals for myself and talk about what was important to me, both at work and at home. The questions asked truly make you think. I was also given a comprehensive program. When completed it is clear what is perhaps being neglected in your life that you may want to work on (and make as a goal). 

When I undertook this coaching I was going through enormous personal and professional challenges. We worked through these challenges step by step so it wasn’t all so overwhelming. As a life coach has no personal agenda, the advice provided was always honest and unbiased.

It was also strange for me to talk about myself for a long period of time, totally selfish time, but it was also extremely uplifting. While I have always been a goal setter, one of the main things I took away from life coaching was to celebrate when I achieved milestones and success, instead of blindly going to the next one. It helped me slow down and smell the roses!” 

(Belinda Merry who wrote this Case study can be reached at belinda@belindam.com, her web site is www.belindam.com)

 
How can i tell what vibes i'm sending out?

The Law of Attraction exists in your life right now; whether you understand it or not; whether you know it or not; and whether you like it or not.

Until you learn to use the Law of Attraction in a deliberate way, most of the time you are not aware that you are attracting into your life more of whatever you are giving your focus, attention, and energy to. This is referred to as non-deliberate attraction. It can be described in a 4-step cycle as follows:

Step 1: I observe what I'm attracting in any area of my life.

Step 2: While observing what I'm attracting, I'm offering a corresponding vibration, whether negative or positive.

Step 3: The Law of Attraction is always checking in to see what my vibration is and matches it obediently, whether wanted or unwanted.

Step 4: As the Law of Attraction responds to my vibration, I receive or manifest into my life more of what I was observing in the first place.

Then the cycle begins at Step 1 and repeats itself over and over again. Here's how the cycle may be working in your life right now:

You may notice that you keep attracting negative people and events into your life. As you notice or observe this, you are emitting or offering a corresponding vibration. The Law of Attraction responds to your vibration by matching it and giving you more of the same. In this example, more of the same simply means that you experience more negative people and events in your life.

Keep in mind the Law of Attraction is a powerful and obedient universal law. It doesn't know whether you want more of something or not; whether it is good for you or not; or whether it is wanted by you or not; it simply gives you more of the same.

If you are curious about what it is you are offering vibrationally in any area of your life, you need only look at the results you are getting in that area - it's always a perfect match. When you observe what you are attracting and you like it, celebrate, and in your celebration, you'll attract more of the same.

When you observe you are attracting something that you don't like, you can use the Law of Attraction deliberately to put a stop to it and change it into something that you DO want. The easiest way to do this is to ask yourself "So, what DO I want?" and then keep your mind focused on this new clarity of desire. Now you are becoming a deliberate offerer about what you do want and the Law of Attraction will respond accordingly. As you continue to practice this, you'll soon be able to check into this area of your life and see the NEW results you are getting.

Michael Losier, a Law of Attraction Trainer and author, supports people in understanding and practicing the Art of Deliberate Attraction, so they can have more of what they want and less of what they don't. Michael has been applying the principles of Law of Attraction for many years and enjoys a wonderful and rewarding life in the city of Victoria, BC, Canada. He facilitates a number of in-person Law of Attraction seminars as well as Teleseminars to a worldwide audience. For more articles by Michael Losier, Teleclass information or to purchase the book, Law of Attraction, The Science of Attracting More of What You Want and Less of What You Don't, visit www.LawOfAttractionBook.com.

 
Parents, Learn How To Teach Law Of Attraction To Your 10-Year Old And Your Teenager

Recently on my seven-city cross-Canada seminar tour I was asked by my Calgary sponsor if I would speak to her group, her son's group. I said yes. What I didn't know was her son's group was a group of 10-year-olds in a grade three class in Alberta.   On the way to the school I designed my presentation. Given this was the first time I had taught Law of Attraction to non-adults, part of my NLP training (Neuro-Linguistic Programming), told me I needed to talk to the children at their level, make it fun, and get them to participate.   When teaching adults I use words like manifestation; vibrations; synchronicity; serendipity; and coincidence. So what words could I use that children would relate too? I decided to open up a conversation about vibes. What did that word mean and what were some examples of it?

Next, I drew a picture of a light switch on the blackboard showing the on and off positions. "On" meant you were negative and "off" meant you weren't. After having the students agree it was better to be positive than negative, I asked if they wanted to learn how to turn off a negative vibe. They all excitedly said yes.

I asked them to write these three words in their notebooks: don't not and no, and asked for examples for when these words were used in their lives. You can bet they had quite a list to give me. Here are some examples:   The students quickly waved their hands in the air. These were some examples I heard:

  1. Don't be late.
  2. Don't get your clothes dirty.
  3. Don't beat up your brother/sister.
  4. Don't talk with your mouth full.
  5. Don't spill your milk.
  6. Don't cry.
  7. Don't play ball in the house.
  8. Don't eat or drink at the computer.

Next I taught them a "secret". They loved knowing I was going to give them a secret. It was my strategy to give them a secret so they would treat it as something special and really want to remember it. I told them it was a secret that even their parents might not know and with this secret they could help change negative vibrations to positive ones.   The students learned that the secret to switching their vibes is when you hear yourself say or think the words don't, not and no, simply say "So, what do I want?" Of course, they eagerly wrote down the answer to the secret.

They got it -- and fast! I knew they'd be going home eagerly wanting to connect this message with their parents. So again I reminded them they had a secret and to be gentle telling others about it. This way the next time their parents said don't, not and no, the kids could say "So, what do you want?"

When the school day ended, the teacher who was also present for my presentation, made one last comment to his departing class as he's been doing every Friday -- "DON'T FORGET YOUR HOMEWORK". The kids had a lot of fun with this. They quickly asked the teacher "So, what do you want?", and of course he said "Remember your homework."

For me this experience was very valuable. Many people have asked me to teach or write about Law of Attraction for teenagers or children and I've always given the same answer. I don't know how to because I don't have any children. Yet I learned that young people can pick it up very quickly. Thanks to Cheryl for trusting me to teach Law of Attraction to her 10-year-old son and his classmates.

Michael Losier, a Law of Attraction Trainer and author, supports people in understanding and practicing the Art of Deliberate Attraction, so they can have more of what they want and less of what they don't. Michael has been applying the principles of Law of Attraction for many years and enjoys a wonderful and rewarding life in the city of Victoria, BC, Canada. He facilitates a number of in-person Law of Attraction seminars as well as Teleseminars to a worldwide audience.  For more articles by Michael Losier, Teleclass information or to purchase the book, Law of Attraction, The Science of Attracting More of What You Want and Less of What You Don't, visit www.LawOfAttractionBook.com.

 
<< Start < Prev 1 2 Next > End >>

Page 1 of 2